Enough to make Nancy Reagan say…

No… R’lyeah?

Yeah… R’lyeah.

I hear Sarah Palin wants to form her own political party to “take this nation back from the liberals which now control both parties”…

AAAAAAH-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!!

Excuse me, little excited there. Sure, why not form batshit-as-all-sodding-getout ultra conservative party? If the party gains any popularity, even in the Klan-belt (more a state of mind than a region, but still… ) then Obama has an easy run in 2012. On the other hand, if I truly wanted to destroy the world I’m sure Bimbo Dearest would do a damn fine job of it. Here are a couple of relevant links:

http://www.washingtontimes.com/news/2009/jul/12/palin-stump-conservative-democrats/

http://www.sarahpac.com/news/news51.aspx

Hey, I enjoy a nice pipe-dream as much as the next undead horror, but let’s keep it a bit closer to realm of possibility, shall we? The scary part is that some folks still take this painted morlock seriously. You just can’t fake batshit like this broad. There, I’ve said as much as needs to be said about politics for now. Except maybe to assert that a woman like Sarah Palin belongs in government as much as perfume belongs on a pig.

This Week’s Movie Review, or… Now For Something A Tad Less Idiotic.

Welcome, welcome kiddies. This time out I’m fulfilling a promise to an aquaintance by doing another review of a classic horror film.

This time we review a neat little “Spaghetti-Horror” film titled La cripta e l’incubo (1964). Known in the USA Crypt Of The Vampire and Terror In The Crypt, this neatly woven Italian horror film is a well acted and strongly cast retelling of Sheridan Le Fanu’s Carmilla with a little bit of devil worship thrown in for no logical reason. Don’t get me wrong, I see nothing wrong with Devil worship but it doesn’t really belong in this story.

Despite this minor faux pas this movie is a rarely seen and less appreciated gem from 1964. Christopher Lee, in a rare turn as a good guy, supports as the victim’s (Adriana Ambesi) father. As usual, his performance is spot on. Among the assortment of nicely creepy inhabitants of the castle is the enigmatic Ljuba, played quite well by Ursula Davis. The film is wonderfully atmospheric as many horror films from Italy are. The Italians always excelled there. Anyway, the film delivers in a big way if you’re a fan of the classics as I am. If you’re not a fan of the classics then gods-dammit why the Hell not?!? Get thee some edumacation, boils and ghouls. It does a body good!

If you’d like to look up this gem and perhaps purchase it, the film was recently re-released under the title “Crypt Of The Vampire”. Maybe the extra information will make the movie easier to find.

Crypt of The Vampire (1964)

CAST:
Adriana Ambesi Laura Karnstein (as Audry Amber)
Nela Conjiu Rowena
Christopher Lee Count Ludwig Karnstein
Ursula Davis Ljuba

Directed by:
Camillo Mastrocinque (as Thomas Miller)

Writing credits:
(in alphabetical order)
Ernesto Gastaldi screenplay (as Julian Berry)
Ernesto Gastaldi story (as Julian Berry)
Sheridan Le Fanu novel “Carmilla”
María del Carmen Martínez Román story
José Luis Monter writer
Bruno Valeri writer (as Robert Bohr)
Tonino Valerii screenplay
Tonino Valerii story

And remember, if you want your questions answered or just want your slimy emails posted on this blog, with whatever commentary I see fit to add of course, then send an email to me at:

oldmonster@daverana.com

… and feel free to vent your spleen. If you don’t, then all that stress will make the meat tough… can’t have that now, can we?

Celebrity Deaths

So we’ve had a lot of deaths over the last month. Don’t get me wrong, I have nothing against dead folks. Hells, no! Some of my best friends are dead. A lot of them aren’t much for conversation mind you, but you expect this from the undead. Hell, a lot of them aren’t much for anything… so I use them for parts.

Oh crap, I’ve gone and let myself get sidetracked again… anyway the deaths I was referring to are of the hollywood kind. Celebrities. Since June 1st we’ve lost David Carradine, Ed MacMahon, Farrah Fawcett, Billy Mays, and of course that (incomprehensibly to my mind) ever so popular pasty white pop star Michael Jackson. The man was more pale than any ghoul I’ve ever known and that was before he kicked the damn bucket. Popularity being what it is, and american taste being determined how it is… and for the record I have no idea what makes Americans like what they like, Michael Jackson is the one among all of them (and many others I haven’t mentioned) who gets all the attention.

After all the specials, news items, blog posts and memorial posts regarding Michael Jackson’s death one thought has managed to remain foremost in my thoughts every time I see a new article on the man:

The saddest thing about Michael Jackson’s death is that so many people don’t know how to spell Michael.

Blood and Stitches everyone!

The Old Monster

AND REMEMBER TO SEND IN THOSE QUESTIONS, ABOUT LOVE, LIFE, CAREER ADVICE, POLITICS, DAMN NEAR ANYTHING. SEND YOUR QUESTIONS TO:

oldmonster@daverana.com