I’ve just been watching an old Hammer film titled Horror Express on a local retro station. Thankfully a movie that old rarely has much to censor by today’s standards, especially a Hammer film. It certainly Isn’t the best film Hammer has to offer, not by a long shot, but I’ll admit I found it more enjoyable than I remembered when I first saw it a few decades ago.
As you’d expect in a horror film of this vintage the science is laughable, but the idea of a mind wipe thorough enough to smooth the ridges of a human brain is interesting to see even if it is a tad comical. The movie also had a lot of funny moments. Telly Savalas showed up as a sadistic no nonsense Cossack officer which is funny enough by itself, well it’s funny if you’re me anyhow, and the scenery chewing doesn’t hurt either. But what exactly is so memorable about the film? The answer can be found in a single line of dialogue:
The scene takes place in a private car (it is a train after all) where two scientists played by Cushing and Lee (but of course) are having a conversation with an inspector regarding the monster who’s been killing passengers. Upon Cushing’s assertion that the monster could be anyone, the inspector supposes that the monster could even be one of the two scientists themselves. Cushing’s response is priceless.
Inspector Mirov: The two of you together. That’s fine. But what if one of you is the monster?
Dr. Wells: Monster? We’re British, you know.
Though panned at it’s release the film has gone on to become a favorite of both Horror Science Fiction fans alike. This movie is definitely good for a quick infusion of nostalgia for you Hammer fans, or maybe for a movie to watch while stoned for those of you who indulge in such things. It’s all good. The Rasputinesque monk is enough for a night’s fun by himself.
cast:
Christopher Lee: Prof. Alex Caxton
Peter Cushing: Dr. Wells
Telly Savalas: Capt. Kazan
Julio Pena: Inspector Mirov
Alberto de Mendoza: FatherPujardov
